The Penguin Who Can't Be Moved
by Nachtgeschichte
Summary: Kowalski's gone and leaves a harsh goodbye note. Will the team move on? Title taken from the song "The Man Who Can't Be Moved" by The Script. Loose connection to my other stories: "Kowalski Must Never Know" and "Skipper's Second..." but can be read separately. Established relationship: Kowalski/Skipper (Skipkow, Kipper, KowalSkip, SkiSki).
1. Initial Phase (Prologue)

A/N: Short prologue, couldn't write more to make a cliffhanger.

* * *

**Dead and Gone**

**"Rico's girl? Oh...that plastic toy! It not only smells horrible, after Rico, but also is covered with dirt. He doesn't take care of it. No wonder, he can't even take care of himself."**

Rico grunted, regurgitating a chainsaw and speeding to the lab. It was true that he didn't pay attention to his appearance and other stuff but no one was allowed to criticise or offend his girlfriend.

Private took the tape recorder in his flipper to hear better the rest of the speech.

**"The stupid and naive kid...hmm...I'm shocked he's still alive. Hehe, it will be funny when they put him in a coffin together with his pony. God, the first one has a toy as a girlfriend, the second as a bff. What's wrong with you all?!"**

"Stupid...naive...I thought he...liked me..." Tears formed in Private's eyes. He had never felt so hurt like right then. He didn't feel angry just upset and disappointed.

"Give me that...thing, Private." Skipper glared, his flippers almost shaking. Maybe because of his fury or maybe out of...fear?

**"Skipper? Oh...Skipperrr, the best dictator that the world needs. He has never noticed that I climbed on his back to get what I want: the position, my own lab and the access to weapon. Sooo easy to manipulate. Paranoid idiot and a bad kisser."**

The leader crushed the recorder so strong that the last sentence sounded deformed. **"I don't have any more patience to spend my precious time in that musty HQ. Kowalski, over and out. Dead and gone."**


	2. Difficult Phase

A/N: References to the episode _Operation: Break-Speare_.

* * *

**One still in love while the other one's leaving**

"Skippah?" Private looked up at his leader with glassy eyes. "What will we do now?"

"Wait. We...I'll wait." _For him. I won't leave it like that. If that's true what we have just heard then...he should tell me that to my beak, mano a mano, a real confrontation. He will repeat it and I'll tell him what I think about him...even if it isn't true, even if I will have to come up with stuff I don't think. I won't give him that satisfaction that he...broke my heart._ "I'll shaft that scum!" He said the last sentence out loud and the scared Private made a step aside.

"Skippah...but what if he doesn't come. You heard him "Dead and gone.", maybe he...you know..." Rico presented what could have happened to Kowalski by imitating a suicide.  
The leader shook his head: "Kowalski and seppuku? First I want to see the corpse, then I can believe in that." And with that he left the HQ.

_No, he isn't a type to commit suicide...but he isn't a type to leave such a /message/ either. Maybe it was inside him, deep down, he crossed the line and...that's what people do, leave a note, before...no! He couldn't...simply couldn't..._

"Hello Skipper, what's wrong?" Marlene jumped over to the artificial island. She knew something was up but the leader hadn't paid much attention to her until Private and Rico joined them.

"Skipper?" Marlene tried again.

"K'walski's gone." Private answered instead.

"Where did he go?"

"We don't know...he just left a message..."

"Private, who gave you permission to share classified information with civilians?" The commanding officer finally snapped back into reality and glared at his soldier.

The otter butted in between the two penguins. "Skipper, ugh, it's not Private's fault. Don't take it out on him."

"Marlene is our friend, she has to know."

"Oh really, or maybe she knows more than we all combined, hm?"

"What are you implying, Skipper?" Marlene backed away.

"You have never come to terms with my relationship with Kowalski."

"That doesn't mean..." She tried to calm him down. "Listen, you have no evidence..."

"Then I will gather some!" He went away.

Marlene looked first at Rico who couldn't care less about Kowalski after what he had heard, then she turned to Private: "What do you make of this?"

"Not much...but...do you think I'm stupid and naive?"

"Oh, Private...of course not." And with that she hugged him.

* * *

"Where is he?" Skipper burst into the lemur habitat.

"Who?" Julian asked lazily from over his throne.

"Kowalski!"

"Who?"

"The brainy penguin, your majesty." Maurice fed the answer.

"Oh, if ya see him, tell him dat I'm still waitin' fe da solar powered karaoke."

"There won't be any more inventions, experiments and lab explosions! No more options, analyses and suggestions...secret notes, stolen kisses and pillow talks." The last tree Skipper mumbled to himself where the previous ones he had shouted to the lemurs.

"Lack of sleep?"

"Seems so..." Maurice and Julien whispered to each other while Skipper started to search for his soldier, demolishing almost everything what landed in his flipper.

"Stop him, Maurice!"

"Better not..." Boom, the bar got into pieces.

"Why are da crazy penguins always destroying my habitat?!"

"Maybe it's their habit."

"You know dat ya're going ta clean dis up, right?"

"Yeah..."

* * *

Skipper sat down under their, his and Kowalski's, tree in the park. He had turned upside down the whole zoo. No evidence, no clue, no Kowalski.

_It's not a joke. Nor a suicide because then I would hav_e _found the body. He really left us...me. I deserve other type of goodbye. More than a sentence on a tape recorder. If he had had a problem, he should have told me it in my beak, no hiding. He knows how much I hate that. But still...I can't say I hat_e him...

"Skippah?" The Brit finally found his leader. "What will we do now?"

"I don't know, Private...I don't know..."


	3. Acute Phase

A/N: Psychotic chapter.

* * *

**I know why the caged bird goes insane – recurrence**

Kowalski opened his eyes but still couldn't see much. He was in a dark room. So far he knew there was a bed, he was sitting on it, and a screen, it was on the "snow" noise. Going in his mind through a list of possible villains who could kidnap him, he got to the conclusion that it could be every foe he knew or even a one whose existence wasn't confirmed. _Empty room._

"Good day Mr Kowalski, how are you today?" A man's voice came from a speaker. _Speakers and cameras._

"Where am I? Who are you? I'm not going to play any games!"

"Na-na, no reason to panic. You're in the PIC of Penguin Corps and I'm your attending physician."

"PIC? My physician?"

"Penguin Illness Clinic. The preliminary diagnosis shows that you suffer from pathological affect together with negativistic and schizotypal personality disorders. But it may be much serious. That's why you're under observation."

"What?" Kowalski didn't know what the terms meant but he was sure it wasn't a normal flu.

"Let me illustrate you." The screen changed and Kowalski saw the familiar scenery of his HQ, his teammates listening to a recorder. One by one he heard the harsh messages he left for his friends and witnessed their reactions. The video ended at the 'Dead and gone' part. The room got silent.

_What was that? Was it me? Did I do it? It's a joke, a deeply unfunny one. But it was my voice...and my recorder..._

"~~The truth hurts.~~" A voice similar to Kowalski's whispered.

"Who...who's there?!" the tall penguin looked around. The same room, bed and screen. _Who said it? Was it me? But I didn't move my beak. And my inner voice...sounds different. Technically it doesn't sound at all but it doesn't have my voice...what was that?_

"~~The true Kowalski.~~"

"Do you read my mind?"

"~~I AM your mind.~~" The whisper changed into normal talk. The scientist stood up from the bed, deciding to ignore the strange voice and talk to the doctor instead.

"Telling them such things was...inappropriate, but not a reason to put me into a funny farm."

"~~To become a responsibility of PIC~~"

"Shut up!"

"Me?" The doctor's voice asked surprised.

"No!"

"Do you remember recording the speech?"

"No..."

"Do you remember biting the paramedic?"

"What?"

"I take this as a no."

Kowalski made few circles through the room, stopping by the wall and hitting his head on it.

"Under the influence of strong emotions, the patient is hurting himself..."

_That was complete bullshit. I would never record something like that, I would never leave my team!_

"~~Don't tell me you don't think like that.~~You're smart enough to know it.~~"

"They're my friends. They do have quirks but I accept them as they are. Their habits don't bother me and they can be heart-warming if they want to. I'm not better. I'm a nerd, alarmist and often a mess but I would never hurt or upset them on purpose!" Kowalski was getting angrier and angrier. "It's ridiculous! Let me go!"

"To whom are you talking to?" The doctor asked concerned.

"To...no one..."

"Are you hearing voices?"

"No!"

"Uhm, I see."

And with that the conversation was over because Kowalski hid under a blanket. _I'm not mental...am I?_


	4. Maniac Phase

A/N: I changed the order a bit, instead of this one there should be a chapter about Skipper but I enjoy to write about Kowalski more, hehe. Anyway, probably 2 chapters + an epilogue to go. Wall motive taken from the movie_ A Beautiful Mind_. Spoiler!= References to Kowalski's claustrophobia from the episode_ Snowmageddon_.

* * *

**Mad scientist vs Mental penguin**

"Let me go. I'm not mental." Kowalski tried to be as convincing as he could muster, emphasising every word.

"You're a danger to yourself and your surroundings, Mr Kowalski."

"~~The doc is right.~~" The voice meddled in again.

"I told you to shout the fuck up!"

"~~You relied on me, your brain, whole your life. What has changed?~~"

"Everything!"

"~~Nothing. Just the fact that you're in the right place.~~"

"Ahhh!" Kowalski jumped down from the bed and wanted to bang the wall with his head again. _Everything to stop the voice...my voice?_

"You're distressed today, Mr Kowalski. What would you say to a manual activity?" A robotic hand showed itself from the wall and passed Kowalski a red crayon.

"O...kay. And where is the sheet of paper?" The wall got lit up by a halogen lamp.

"The wall? Am I supposed to write on the wall?"

"~~You always wanted to do it. Take is as an opportunity to make your wish come true.~~"

"What should I write?"

"Whatever you want, Mr Kowalski. Free your imagination."

Standing in front of the white wall, Kowalski decided that it would be wise to just write some formulas. _Mathematical, physical, chemical, whatever, just to keep my mind in shape and to relax a bit._

"Uhm...doc?" He asked while writing a random formula.

"Yes?"

"No, nothing. I was just wondering...is the air shaft working?

"Of course, Mr Kowalski. Is it a problem with the room?"

"No, no!" _Except for the fact that it got smaller over the time of my nap...no! I can't let my claustrophobia pick on me and give them more reasons to lock me here... _

The penguin sighed and looked at his work. He had stopped paying attention to what he was writing long before the claustrophobia attack. His left flipper moved automatically. The formulas slowly changed into drawings. Drawings of his team mates. He was about to finish the fifth portrait of Skipper. "Oh..."

"Is something wrong, Mr Kowalski?"

"No, not at all...Skipper didn't tell me about PIC." Kowalski tried to change the topic.

"Because he doesn't know that it exists."

"Will you inform him that I'm here?"

"Yes, we'll...soon."

"Can I talk to him?"

"No, it would disturb the process of observation. Besides...we're not sure he wants to talk to you." Kowalski turned his head to the screen which showed the lemur habitat and the shouting Skipper. _No more inventions, experiments and lab explosions? No more options, analyses and suggestions? That's all he needs me for? As his scientist? option guy? ...puppet?_

"What? He said something more. What did he say?" Kowalski couldn't hear Skipper's mumble.  
"He said that it was better this way, Mr Kowalski."

"Better?" _No, no...no!_

"~~It was obvious that you would go crazy. It's Skipper's fault!~~Now that he eliminated you from his life, you are useless~~"

Kowalski came back to the formulas, shaking from anger.

"How do you feel now, Mr Kowalski?"

"Not your business!"

"Na-na. I need to know in order to create an effective treatment."

"What for? Maybe there is no point to recover..."

"~~Everyone can be replaced. He'll find a new option guy.~~" _And a new lover..._

_"_Leave me alone!" Kowalski threw the crayon towards the wall, it split into pieces.  
"Looks like we're done for today with the manual activities. Thank you for cooperation, Mr Kowalski." The mentioned penguin came back to bed.


	5. Solid Phase

A/N: Title of this chapter is a reference to a book. Going to explain it in my journal on DeviantArt. Two chapters to go - the final one and epilogue. Skipper waits under the three in the park because it's /their place/, it's connected to _Kowalski Must Never Know_ but that chapter hasn't been up yet.

* * *

**Waiting for The Throbbing Cerebellum**

Skipper jumped back to the HQ.

"Skippah! I'm so glad you're here. We need to do the training...or something." Private waddled towards his commanding officer, being happy to see him and hoping that the madness was finally over. Kowalski's desertion made the Brit extremely upset but he was more worried that together with Kowalski the team would lose Skipper.

"Yeah...do it." The leader picked his mug, a vacuum flask and a sleeping bag, not paying much attention to his soldier.

"Skippah? Where are you going?"

"To the park." And he was gone._ Something bad must have happened in other case he would be already here, He wouldn't survive without me...he wouldn't leave me!_

"What?" Private was following him. "But Skippah, we need you here. We're a team!"

"And we don't let anyone swim alone." Skipper added when suddenly the earth started to shake.

"Rico!" Private screamed while Rico kaboomed random objects in the HQ. "We have to stop him, Skippah!"

"Yeah...do it." Just like earlier Skipper answered indifferently.

"Nahhh! Wait here. I'll be right back." Hardly had the small penguin left when Skipper maintained his journey to the park.

After two hours of struggling with Rico, Private was finally able to join his leader again. The search for him took the Brit another hour. He found Skipper under a tree. It seemed that the penguin was prepared to spend the night there.

"Skippah?" Private placed his flipper on his commanding officer's shoulder.

"Where...when did I make the mistake? Because...I must have done something wrong. I...didn't appreciate him? I did! In my special way...maybe he didn't understand it? He should have, he's smart." Skipper's voice was cracking.

"It's not your fault, Skippah."

"It is! It...is. He has told me once that he will never leave my side as long as I don't break things..."

Marlene along with Rico came up to the two penguins. "I'm not recognizing you, Skipper. Earlier you wouldn't – "

"Earlier I wasn't in relationship with my second in command!" Skipper snapped and turned to glare at the otter. Private, feeling very uncomfortable, just took his flipper away and mumbled an apology.

"He can't be moved. Is he crazy? What will you do now?" Marlene whispered to the Brit.

"Crazy in love, I guess." Private shrugged. "Nothing, wait."

"For what?"

"For K'walski."

So they waited in silence which sometimes got broken by Private's sighs or Marlene's nervous tapping. Now and then someone came up with a small talk which was nipped in the bud by Skipper's growl. Rico got bored and started to chase every living creature. Busy with fighting against a fly he regurgitated a swat and hit it will all the force he got in his flipper. The poor insect…exploded.

"What the deuce?!" A burning fly?!" Skipper shook his head, waking up from his almost coma state and taking a closer look at the mysterious thing. "It wasn't a fly but a camera, a flying camera. Someone has been spying on us all the time! Twenty-four-hour invigilation!" Private gasped and Rico chocked up a bomb. "But who?" Skipper would ask his option guy for the answer but his option guy was gone. _I feel like lacking my right flipper...and half of my heart..._

"Stupid question. Who could that be? Kowalski of course! He sits somewhere and watches you being miserable and all, laughing his ass off!"

"No, it's not true! I'll never believe that he would do that!"

"Admit it. Deep down you know I am right."

"My guts know better!" Marlene and Skipper held a stare contest until the otter turned on her heel and headed back to the zoo. Private and Rico sat down next to Skipper. The three penguins watched as the Sun went down.


	6. Final Phase - part 1

A/N: I'll split the final chapter into two parts and add an epilogue in the end. Who is the doctor? Write your types in the review section.

* * *

**The Penguin Who Couldn't Rely on Himself**

Kowalski opened one eye. It was an unwritten rule that after every nap he stated that he wanted to go out and that he wasn't mental. That time he didn't feel up to do it, feeling mentally burnt out. Plus he refused to eat and drink anything, fearing that it could be his last meal or drink.

"Mr Kowalski, we can't neglect your body needs." The doctor's voice sounded sweetly.

"I'm not going to eat. You shoved a pill to that fish, I'm sure ."

"Even if, it's only for your good, Mr Kowalski. We both know it."

Kowalski sighed and looked down at the plate. He was tired, lost and above all – very hungry. But for the pill, he would already have gulped that fish down. _I need to stop thinking. Maybe taking the pill isn't such a bad idea? Maybe it will help me...but I know nothing about it and how I'll react to it..._

An audible noise interrupted his thoughts and a new voice spoke through the speaker: "Kowalski! Don't give up! It's my fault you're here but I'll get you out. I promise."

"Who's speaking?" _I have heard that voice before, I know its owner but I can't recall who was it..._

"It was my assistant. He wants to save the whole world. Don't mind him. He just got too involved into your medical case." The physician's voice didn't sound as convincing as before. "Please eat your meal, Mr Kowalski." _Something is wrong with that doc. My guts tell me that I need to get out of here...but my mind says...I can't rely on my brain anymore! I don' want to be here!_

"No, I want to see Skipper first. I'm not mental!"

"~~Yes, you are! Eat that damn fish!~~"

"No!" The penguin threw the plate with the fish towards the wall just like he had done previously with the crayon.

"Kowalski!" _That voice again._ "It's me, Randy!" _Randy, the ram, but what is a sheep doing in a penguin clinic?! _"Randy?! Get me out of here! Help me!"

"The patient's state gets gradually worse. Everything is okay, Mr Kowalski, it's just a paracusia - "

"No, it's not! It's not okay! I may be hallucinating but I don't belong here!" The penguin jumped out of the bed and started his desperate search for a hidden door. Instead he found two robotic hands which grabbed him by his flippers. The struggle wasn't effective and Kowalski was soon pinned down to the bed. Third robohand was coming closer with a syringe. _The pill changed into a syringe. Lov_ely._ Where is Randy when you need him? _

There was a crack, rush and light. Kowalski thought that it was the result of the injection as he saw Skipper in front of him. The commanding officer tore apart the robotic hands and freed the scientist. "Looks like I found the right castle." Skipper smirked, helping the other one to get up of the bed. Kowalski noticed the syringe lying on the floor. It was full which meant that it wasn't hallucination.

_What should I tell him? Skipper, I hear voices. Skipper, I want to go home. Skipper..._

"...I love you." Kowalski blurted out.

Skipper embraced the penguin and the two walked out of the room to the other penguins, Randy and Kowalski's attending physician.  
"You?!" Kowalski backed away when he saw the doctor. "But how? Why?"

"I know everything about you and your thinking processes. I have cracked you..."

* * *

A/N: When I wrote about the three robohands I was like 'I have seen enough Internet to know where it leads too...' but I won't write it down here, hehe.


	7. Final Phase - part 2

A/N: All the questions are answered, the mystery revealed. The aftermath of the events from the episode_ P.E.L.T. _

* * *

**The Penguin Who Didn't Need to Rely on Himself**

Kowalski was on the mental and physical edge. Fresh air, bright light, loudness of the voices and noises made him dizzy. Although he slept almost all the time in that room, he felt out of energy. Not to mention hunger and thirst. He even wasn't sure how much time he spent there but it felt like ages. All he wanted was to feel safe again, not paying much attention to what was going on around him.

"Penguins, I'm really sorry...I don't know what made me help her out...It's just...we were neighbours for a long time and we sometimes talked to each other...well, mostly I talked because she hadn't got time..."

"To the banks, Randy..." Skipper urged the ram impatiently.

"When she was missing, I felt lonely and decided to find her...she was in your base, next to the car and...I took her out to the Sun...and I unfroze her..."

The penguin leader started to pace back and forth. "And with that you gave her a full access to our base, including the lab and all inventions!"

"I said I'm sorry..."

"That's not enough! Because of her we thought that Kowalski left us and he thought that he's mental!"

Kowalski looked around the place, trying to sort out everything in his head.

_Easy Kowalski, cool as a cucumber. Let's see what she used...my fly cameras...she must have spied on us with them...next...my tape recorder...okay, she recorded the fake /message/ on in...but with what means? _

Kowalski rummaged through the random objects, looking for the answer to his question. After finding it, he sat down, not being able to stand any longer. "My voice changer?!"

"Yeah, you hit the jackpot, sub-genius. I used your changer to transform my voice into yours for the tape recording. Later I used it for becoming the physician and finally to produce the creepy voice." She smirked. "Still, it was nice to see you going crazy, thanks for playing."

"That's all?" Kowalski asked disappointed. After learning the truth, Kowalski's first thought was to go back to that room but he shoved it away. _Camera, recorder and a voice changer?_ _In the room everything seemed so...serious and doomed. Now it's just a trifle, a prank! I have been fooled...again._

"Yes, and we're happy that it's over." Skipper took the invention out of Kowalski's flipper. "Let's go. Rico will take care of the poultry..." The leader gave some more orders but the scientist didn't listen to them anymore.

For a moment Kowalski and Blue Hen's eyes met. He was beak to beak with his 'attending physician'. But he wasn't angry at her, more at himself; being so stupid to fall into the mind trap. _A web which had been intricately weaved around me. Why? What was the cause? I should have foreseen it! Maybe because deep down...I don't really believe in myself and I doubt the power of my mind...but...there is someone I will always believe in and someone I will never doubt. I don't need to rely on myself._ The penguin broke the eye contact and turned to Skipper.


	8. Recovery Phase (Epilogue)

A/N: The last chapter. Thanks for faving, following and reviewing. I'll write a longer author's note in my DA journal.

* * *

**Kowalski's stream of consciousness**

_I'm back in the HQ. In my bunk, well technically in Skipper's bunk but that's not that important. Of course it's important that Skipper's holding me in his flippers but we could lie in my bunk and it would be fine too. As long as it's not a bed in a small room with a screen, camera and speaker. I flounder again, aren't I? _

_When I close my eyes, I'm afraid that when I open them I will be back in front of that wall. It will take some time, days...maybe weeks, before I will be able to get a healthy sleep, not to mention a normal life. But with Skipper and my friends on my side I'm going to overcome it. In fact, I have learnt much thanks to Hen. It settled my priorities. Changed my view on some things. It wasn't that bad after all, was it? _

_In a second everything became ridiculous. I haven't even left the zoo. The recorder was a provocation, the videos were out of context, the voice wasn't mine. Nothing really happened. I am not mental...Am I? _


End file.
